Am I really a grown up?
Am I really a grown up?
It hit me suddenly, once I posted photos of our new home on Facebook and the likes and comments began to pour in, that people may have thought we bought our new home.
We did not. It’s a rental in a duplex. We simply upgraded rentals to something much nicer.
But the fact that my family, my friends, and even people from my high school days genuinely thought the husband man and I bought a home gave me the strangest feeling. Does everyone really think I’m that grown up?
I can’t buy a home. I’m 22 freaking years old. I mean yes, I graduated college. Yes, I’m married. Yes, my husband and I already live together and both have full time jobs. But…but…people actually buy homes after all those steps don’t they?
Well, we’re not. We’re not getting a dog for awhile either, and we’re definitely not having kids. I may have started life quickly; graduating in three years and getting married right after but that doesn’t mean I’m any sort of grown up.
I’m notorious for leaving the stove on after I cook dinner, forgetting my gym shoes when I want to work out, and never locking the car door when I go in stores. I’m constantly losing things, burning things, and breaking things. And I’m perfectly okay with all that. I don’t want to be my mom yet. I want to make mistakes. I am 22 years old. I don’t have life figured out, my spiritual beliefs pinned down, know where I’ll be living in ten years, or even what I want to be when I grow up.
I grew up enough to know the difference between right and wrong, to get a degree, to get a full time job, to love myself so much that I could let that love overflow into another, to decide to spend the rest of my life with that guy, and to rent a home with a garage and dishwasher.
But I’m no grown up.
I still have lots of growing to do before buying a home, taking care of a dog, taking care of human being, or even taking care of a plant. I’m proud of my husband and I for being responsible enough with finances to upgrade rental homes, but I’m also proud of the fact that we stay up until 2 AM drinking and eating junk food and then sleep until noon every now and then.
We’re financially and personally responsible kids at heart and soul. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Most people don’t grow up. Most people age. They find parking spaces, honor their credit cards, get married, have children, and call that maturity. What that is, is aging.”
– Maya Angelou